HOMETOWN HERO NABS VULCAN BEAU!
by Mia-Hood
Summary: An editorial for a newspaper in James T. Kirk's native Iowa gives an exclusive on the captain's recent and controversial marriage to his Vulcan First Officer, Mr. Spock! K/S Title taken fron Bad Title Challenge. Inspired by Sensate Focus by Lyrastar.


**HOMETOWN HERO NABS VULCAN BEAU**

It has just been revealed that Starfleet golden boy and native Iowan, Captain James T. Kirk has finally tied the knot. And who, you ask, has taken "T for Tomcat" Kirk off the market? Why, no other than his own First Officer, Commander Spock of Vulcan!

The two were reportedly married on the 3rd of November on their ship, the _USS Enterprise_ by the Ships Records Officer with Senior Medical Officer, Dr. Leonard McCoy as witness.

"I was on my break shift when I was called to the captain's quarters. Performing a wedding ceremony was the last thing I expected to do!" said Joshua Dodge, the Records Officer aboard the _Enterprise_ who ratified the marriage. "It was a real case of 'Who shaves the barber?'"

The rest of the crew of the _Enterprise_ seemed to be equally surprised by this turn of events.

"I didn't know the Captain was gay," said Ships Navigator, Pavel Chekov, at the news.

"I did," chimed in Helmsman Hikaru Sulu, who was also present during the interview.

"I think it's terribly romantic," commented Communications Officer Nyota Uhura.

These, however, are just some of the comments which have been generated by this pair's forage into holy matrimony.

As you may remember, Commander Spock made quite a stir when he first joined Starfleet, being the first Vulcan to serve aboard an all-human Starfleet vessel. He is also the first half human, half Vulcan to enter the 'Fleet, being the son of Ambassador Sarek of Vulcan and a Terran, Lady Amanda.

Record-breaking, however, is no big thing for this bombshell of a couple. At 31, James Kirk shot through the ranks at Starfleet Academy and became the youngest captain in Federation history, a title he still holds. (He also happens to be the first cadet at the Academy to beat the "no-win" Kobayashi Maru simulation test.) During their 5-year mission on the _USS Enterprise_, Captain Kirk and Commander Spock continue to make history throughout the galaxy.

On Earth, too, they have become household names and even years before their shotgun-like union was made known, rumors about the nature of their relationship circulated in the more sordid of tabloids.

Clara Goodwin, the editor of Starfleet's planetary newsletter, _The Hum_, called Kirk and Spock "the pair of the century" and says she is "pleasantly surprised" by the development of the Captain and the Commander's relationship.

"Whether for love or just to make a statement, their union is a ground-breaking achievement for the Federation," said Goodwin in a follow-up editorial.

Others have a much more pessimistic view on the matter.

"The more these space cowboys and hippies preach about supposed 'tolerance and unity between races and planets', the closer we come to a future where the human race is drowned in an alien gene pool." First Earth movement spokesperson Ryan Spieling said at the podium of a protest held outside of Starfleet Headquarters in San Francisco, California.

Starfleet Headquarters has not, as yet, released a statement concerning the newly weds and it is still uncertain as to whether the two will continue to serve on the _Enterprise_ together.

Interestingly enough there are fleeting rumors circulating that Spock's father, the Vulcan Ambassador, has intervened on the couple's behalf and has privately urged Starfleet to keep Kirk and Spock on the same ship. He is said to have cited "Vulcan matrimonial issues" as his concern.

There have been some hints, of course, that Ambassador Sarek's reasons for this request may have stemmed from the fact that Vulcans are telepaths. This knowledge, however, leaves us more wanting than satisfied.

"I've served five years on the same ship as Spock," said senior officer and wedding witness, Dr. Leonard McCoy when questioned about the rumors. "And if there's one thing I've learned it's that trying to puzzle out a Vulcan's motives is like trying to get a stone to bleed: you best give up and get a drink instead."

The only comment the Ambassador himself would make was, "I find my son's choice to be… logical."

The most telling (and tantalizing) tidbit on the matter, however, has come from an unusual source.

"I don't know what Starfleet's decision is going to be, but I sure hope they let the Captain and Mr. Spock be because trying to keep them apart will be like trying to keep gravity off your back," said Montgomery Scott, _Enterprise_'s Chief Engineer. "You cannot change the laws of physics, and I should know.

"If you want my opinion - and I reckon since you're interviewing me, you do - they've only become a better command team since they got hitched. It's uncanny, but it's almost like they can read each other's minds these days!"


End file.
